Tuesday, July 1, 2008

for fathers

There once was a poor young man who lived in a small village outside Dhaka, Bangladesh. Every day he would travel into the city to attend school. His father gave him 10 taka each day to pay for his transportation and lunch. He would hop on a truck into the city for 3 taka each way, and eat lightly and spend 3 taka on his lunch. This left him with 1 taka remaining. 1 taka every day for whatever he chose: more food, saving for a new shirt, giving back to his father. But instead he opened a bank account and deposited 1 extra taka a day for his daughter. "If I should be so fortunate as to have a female child," he would say to himself, "this money will be for her education." Every extra bit he had, the man would save for her. Nobody would spend this money except for his future daughter.
For years and years he saved: extra money from work, from loans, from grants, everything. He sacrificed much potential comfort in case he was fortunate enough to someday have a female child. The man saw the type of life that women had in his country and culture, and saw potential for change. He wanted to see an end to women being treated as fourth- or fifth-class citizens. He hoped for a society where women could be equal with men: could go to the marketplace alone and get an education and choose for themselves the lives they wanted. Above that increased right in his country, he wanted a female child to make into a good, educated, international citizen. One who had responsibility in the world. So he saved all the time. Never took money from her account, except to marry her mother, and even then he paid it back. With interest. And when his wife became pregnant, he at last really dared to hope for a female child.
And then, finally, one day she was born. And he was glad for the money he had been putting away. Their family taught her good things at home, and when she was old enough, the man and his wife searched for reputable schools for her. She was sent to an international boarding school in India. The man was able to pay her tuition and exam fees. And they taught her to have respect for herself and for women and to value education and try to be something big and important. Today the man's female child is about to write a book, graduate from school, hopefully get a scholarship to a good college, and move out and make her mark on the world. And the man is very proud of his female child.

We need more men like Sohel Mahmud Sagar. People who, even growing up in a male-dominated society with 4 brothers, still can see the importance of gender equality in the home, workplace, and world. He was willing to make a sacrifice for a daughter he hoped he would someday have, in a society where female children are seen as a burden, not a blessing. But he hoped for the opportunity to bring up one daughter and to add her to a future generation of empowered women. With vision like this, and sacrifice, and patience, and hope...these are the type of people we can count on to lead us into a more progressive and equal and prosperous future.

1 comment:

Terry Moffitt said...

Alexis! What an adventurous spirit you are! Can't wait to see what you do with your knowledge and skills. We missed all of you at the July 4th breakfast. When you return, I'll make a you nice, cold, refreshing Orange Julius!

Take care and we'll look forward to reading your thoughts about the country. This is probably some place I'll never visit to I want to learn about it through you.